Overheard in Pittsburgh

Inbound Bus Stop, Kelly / S. Trenton, Wilkinsburg:

Lady: [to her son and his friend] I don’t understand why you spend all your time playing video games. It’s like you’re so wrapped up in them, you don’t even take time to watch television anymore.

— Overheard by Alisa Grishman

Elevator, Litchfield Tower C, Pitt Campus. After Midnight.
A forlorn, disheveled Student talks to his less-disheveled friend:

Student #1: Ugh.
Student #2: What?
Student #1: Stephen Colbert just directed his Nerd Army to attack Wikipedia again.
Student #2: What, really? He’s still doing stuff like that?
Student #1: Yeah, I don’t know; I guess telling his mindless drones to fuck up their school’s dictionaries wasn’t hilarious enough.
Student #2: Didn’t he used to make fun of guys like that? Is he making fun of his fans, or what? I mean, what’s his point?
Student #1: Yeah; I used to think that stuff was funny, but now it’s just kind of weird and sad. I’m kind of ready for him to be over now.
Student #2: Yeah.

— Overheard by I used to think he was funny too

Editor’s Note: I have loved Stephen Colbert’s work for a long time — Exit 57, Strangers with Candy, the Daily Show, and his current series — but I think this stuff’s a little done, too. At what point did Colbert stop merely mimicking the charismatic leaders of cult-like movements and actually become one? When does the cost of the joke exceed the payoff? I really wish Colbert would stop with the Rocky-Horror-Picture-Show-audience-participation biz would stop so I can feel OK about liking his series again. — Chris

Toy Department, Target, Waterfront:

Punk Girl: [to Emo Boy with Caucasian ‘Fro]: This smells like your job.

Wal-Mart, North Fayette. 8:30 p.m.
A married couple in their late 20s contemplate a purchase:

Wife: Do you want to buy Snakes on a Plane?
Husband: I don’t know. Do you want to buy it?
Wife: Does it even matter?

— Overheard by Joe

Health Services, CMU.
A nurse checks a student’s infected ear:

Nurse: You ALL messed up in yo’ head!
Student: What?
Nurse: I regret to inform you that you have an ear infection.

— Overheard by TheConnor

Marc Broussard Show, Mr. Small’s Theatre, Millvale:

Guy: Hey, they’re selling CDs of tonight’s show to benefit Hurricane Katrina victims.
Girl: Oh, wow. That’s so cool. Go buy one and I’ll burn a copy off of you.

— Overheard by Etzel

Heinz Field Exit Ramp, North Side. After a loss to the Patriots:

Creamsicle* #1: I’m writing to Big Ben and Joey Porter tomorrow to tell them they’re a bunch of assholes.
Creamsicle #2: I know!

— Overheard by McArdle

* Overheard in Pittsburgh TrendWatch: Agent McArdle informs us that a “Creamsicle” is a “girl who is tanned to the point that her skin is orange, and bleached to the point that her hair is cream-colored.”

Cold Stone Creamery, Waterworks Mall:

Cheerleader #1: What did you get?
Cheerleader #2: A “Cookie Doughn’t You Want Some™”
Cheerleader #1: No, but what did you get?
Cheerleader #2: A “Cookie Doughn’t You Want Some™”
Cheerleader #1: No, I asked what you got!

And on, and on, until she finally realized her tragic mistake.

— Overheard by Rachel