Overheard in Pittsburgh

Bryce Jordan Center, Penn State University. After the Schenley-Chester PIAA AAAA Championship Basketball Game.
A pair of black teenage girls dressed in the Schenley red and black pass a small group of dejected Chester fans in black and orange:

Girl #1: Take them Halloween colors back to Chester! , nigga! BOO!!— Overheard by get ‘em, spartans!

Intro to Psychology Class, David Lawrence Hall, Pitt.
The professor asks for a volunteer to see if strangers can estimate someone’s personality based on their appearance. A 6′5″, 270-pound football player steps to the front:

Professor: So, what do you think this guy is like?
Student: He’s outgoing?
Professor: Are you outgoing?
Football Player: [unenthusiastically] Yeh.
[Discussion continues...]
Voice from the Back: He likes cake?
Professor: Um… do you like cake?
Football Player: Yeh.

Mon Incline, Mount Washington:

Young Man #1: I thought there were three rivers in Pittsburgh; I only see two.
Young Man #2: No, the third river is about a mile or two away.
Young Man #1: OK, yeah, that makes sense. That’s probably how they got the name for that old stadium.

Pittsburgh Penguins Hockey Game, Mellon Arena:
Two men are speaking Russian, intermittently screaming at the players.

Yinzer: Yinz from Canada?
Russian Man: Nope. Russia.
Yinzer: Same thing.

— Overheard by Pens Fan

Bus Stop, 5th / Market, Downtown. Evening.
An old, crazy homeless man wanders down the street, mumbling to himself, until he grabs a guy by the arm and speaks louder:

Crazy Homeless Man: Pittsburgh’s lost it, man, it’s lost it’s CLASS. Steelers ain’t got no cheerleaders, ain’t got no class. Pittsburgh’s an asshole. A fucked asshole. No cheerleaders. No class.

[Crazy Homeless Man resumes walking and mumbling.]

— Overheard by Megan

William Penn Tavern, Shadyside.
Lynard Skynard plays on the jukebox:

White Guy: Play some “Freebird”!
Black Guy with Afro: Man, I didn’t pick my hair for 3 hours to hear this shit!

— Overheard by Frenchy

Section 104, Heinz Field. 3rd Quarter of a Steelers Game:

Drunk Guy: How many periods are in football?
Yinzer: Well, first off, this is football, not hockey. That’s why these are the Steelers and not the Pens.
Drunk Hunter: That’s why I like baseball games: With three periods, they’re not as long as football.

Office, Downtown:

Young Junior Accountant: Dude, all the flags are at half staff because Coach retired.
Co-Worker: No, that’s because President Ford died.
Junior: Oh.

— Overheard by aurora

Delta Airlines Flight, Cincinnati to Pittsburgh.
The passengers have endured overbookings, delays, and multiple gate changes:

Middle-aged Yinzer Woman: I used to hate Cincinnati because of their football team. Now I really hate Cincinnati!

Point Park University, Downtown:

Prospective Point Park Student: How is your football team?

Point Park Tour Guide: You mean the Steelers?

— Overheard by Point Park student