Overheard in Pittsburgh

67F Outbound, near CVS, Wilkins Ave, Squirrel Hill

Man: That’s the house where my sister shot her husband.

[Silence.]

Thanksgiving Party, Squirel Hill.
Five guests play Scrabble™ while the turkey finishes roasting. Guest #1 puts a four letter word onto the board:

Guest #2: Take that back.
Guest #3: I think he can play it; it’s certainly a real word.
Hostess: What’s all the fuss?
Guest #2: He just played “jews” for 20 points with a double-word score.

—Overheard by The Connor

59U Inbound, Squirrel Hill.
Two College Girls are carting their groceries back to their CMU dorm:

College Girl #1: I think as I get closer to turning 21 I get stupider by the day. I mean, I don’t have any common sense anymore.

College Girl #2 nods her head in agreement.

— Overheard by Pharout

Eat’n'Park, Squirrel Hill.
Two Retired Teachers talk loudly over their husbands:

Retired Teacher #1: [to Retired Teacher #2] I thought for sure I would die in the classroom. Guess I was wrong.

–Overheard by Psychic Sarah

Self-Checkout Line, Giant Eagle, Squirrel Hill. Sunday night:

Blonde chick: We save 96 cents on our next FuelPerks™. That’s, like, almost a dollar.

Forbes Ave, Squirrel Hill.
A college-aged guy with black and blonde hair is riding down the sidewalk on a bike, when a group of younger kids walk by him:

Girl: I love you Emo Biker Man!

— Overheard by Feightner

61C Inbound, Squirrel Hill.
Two hearing-impaired people are arguing in sign language, both signers becoming more emphatic. Their signs larger and faster, Signer #1 accidentally hits another passenger:

Signer #2, using small, slow sign language: You don’t have to shout. I’m not blind.

— “Overheard” by Rob

Restaurant, Squirrel Hill.
A young, tired-looking woman is paying at the cash register:

Young Yinzer Dude: [Shuffling to the counter] Hey, do yinz have any mayo packets?
Tired Young Woman: [Looks horrified] STAY WITH THE BABY!
[Everyone looks across the room to see an unattended baby carrier sitting on the floor.]