Overheard in Pittsburgh

Lower-Level Math Class, Doherty Hall, CMU campus:

Professor: Come on, even the Pitt kids would get this one.

— Overheard by egg

First day of class for 85-251, “Personality,” at Carnegie Mellon:

Guy #1: Why’re you taking a class on personality? You don’t have one.
Guy #2: That’s why I’m taking it. I’m learning how to get one.
— Overheard by Ka-CHANG

Wean Hall, Carnegie Mellon. A few minutes before a recitation is about to start, weeks into the semester:

Confused Guy: [poking his head in the door] ‘ey, is this econ theory?
[Several people tell him that it's not.]
Confused Guy: What the hell? [walking away] I coulda SWORN….

— Overheard by Ka-CHANG

College of Fine Arts, CMU.
An art class has gathered in the middle of the Great Hall, spread in a circle that blocks passage. A music teacher with a Tuba noisily walks through the circle:

Art Teacher: Hey! You! Your tuba’s fucking up my circle!
Music Teacher: Yeah? Well, your circle’s fucking up my tuba.
Art Teacher: Touché.
— Overheard by Connor 

Chemistry Class, Doherty Hall, Carnegie Mellon:

Frustrated girl: Usually, when I put it next to my boob, it works!
— Overheard by Kevin

McConomy Auditorium, CMU.
Perplexed people leave a showing of The Illusionist:

Guy: You know, magician movies are just like ye olde heist movies.

— Overheard by M. Davies

University Center, Carnegie Mellon.
A few people talk in a group near the revolving door:

Asian Guy: [to Blonde Girl] Can I be your girlfriend?
Blonde Girl: Are you Jewish?
Asian Guy: Mmhmm.
Blonde Girl: Then yes, you can!
— Overheard by Connor 

67A Outbound, Oakland.
A Little Boy in a Steelers Jacket stares out the window, commenting on what he sees loudly and uninteligably. At the Carnegie Mellon stop, the Walking to the Sky statue comes into view:

Little Boy: One day I’m going to buy that statue and send it back to New York!
— Overheard by Connor

Near the Purnell Center, CMU.
Two guys discuss the one’s ghost hunting adventure:

Guy #1: So, did you find anything that went bump in the night?
Guy #2: No, but there were plenty of things that went yawn in the night.

Carnegie Mellon Shuttle. Classes are done for the day:
Loud Girl: I made a New Year’s Resolution to stop being slutty.
Male Friend: Yeah, I heard about that.
Loud Girl: Oh my god, I’m the worst slut ever.
Male Friend: Yeah, you told me at the party.
[...]
Loud Girl: [getting off the bus] So, maybe I’ll see you again this weekend?

— Overheard by Kevin