Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas to everyone out there in TV Land. Overheard in Pittsburgh will return New Year’s Day.
Hurray!
{ Monthly Archives }
December 2007
After the divorce, Santa started to take everything way too seriously.
Target, Waterfront.
A small child picks up a Scooby-Doo DVD:
Mother: Put that back. Maybe Santa will buy it for you.
Small Child: [showing her the DVD] But look! It has a… MONKEY!
Mother: OK, but put it back. Santa might get that for you. If Santa finds out you bought that, it will hurt his feelings.
“Just check your wallet.”
Colangelo’s, Strip District. Lunchtime.
A drunk guy has overheard three old guys talking about tricking people out of money:
Drunk Guy: [laughing] Yeah, my grandfather was an alcoholic, and we used to send him to the bar with ten dollars. He’d come back with twenty-five bucks and he’d be completely smashed!
Old Guy: Did you learn any of his tricks?
Drunk Guy: [burps] You bet I did!
— Overheard by Smokey
“But do you really think it should be a surprise party?”
Outside Wholey’s Fish Market, Strip District:
Mom: [to young daughter in exhausted tone]: We. Are. Having. A. Party. For. Jesus. On. Christmas!
— Overheard by Megan
“Consider your answer carefully.”
Target, Waterfront:
Mom: Stop running around the store. Hold my hand or someone will steal you. Do you want someone to steal you?
Alright, who posted my fan fiction?
Silky’s, Bloomfield:
Dude: Unless you see it in 3-D, that Beowulf movie is just Shrek with tits.
— Overheard by pudhaus.
Some santa hats would brighten up their posters.
Bus Stop near Planned Parenthood, Liberty Ave, Downtown.
A girl is talking on her cell phone about her clinic visit and the people outside:
Girl on Cell: Yeah, so in the Christmas spirit, I didn’t spit in their faces today. I was proud of myself.
— Overheard by Amused
Too bad it’s a test on metaphors
Classroom, Cathedral of Learning, Pitt.
A test is being taken:
Sweater Set Girl: It’s game time! Too bad I hate sports…
“It was a hard roll when I started.”
Hunt Library, Carnegie Mellon University:
College Girl: [to guy] And then you fucked a bagel?!
— Overheard by trying to get that mental image out of my head so I can study again
“The elves have contructed the most wondrous glory holes!”
South Side Works, South Side. Santarchy 2007:
Mrs. Claus: [to Drag Queen Santa] You should come to the fetish ball.
— Overheard by Why are we working on Saturday?