Overheard in Pittsburgh

Outside Carnegie Library, Oakland.
Some high school kids are chasing another high school kid. A boy, their age, on the steps yells:

Kid on Steps: You gay! You humped him; that makes you gay! Gaaaaaay!
Girl on Steps: Wait, you say he’s gay? Yo! [Girl chases them.] Come back here! You gay? You gay?! I wanna talk to you if you gay!

Litchfield Towers. 1:30 AM Friday night:

Girl struggling to stand up: Guys, pizza and a cocktail aren’t the same thing!

— Overheard by Jenna

Atwood / Forbes, Oakland.
Two white college-aged thugs are storming down the street, loudly complaining about someone borrowing an item and not returning it:

Thug #1: And now I’ma haffa buy a fucking new one!
Thug #2: Fuck that!
Thug #1: Yeah, fuck that! Nah, I’m a text message his ass and tell him to give it back!

— Overheard by Black or White, Thugs Are Silly

Parking Lot, Waterfront

Middle-aged Man: [on cell phone, bluntly] We left your sister’s party because you threw up on the cake.

Dish, South Side. Saturday Night.
Two well-dressed late-20-something couples are standing at the bar. One gentleman excuses himself:

Classy Dame: That’s my boyfriend and we will be so hot together.

[Ten minutes later: The couple is outside, pressed up against the building making things hot and heavy.]

— Overheard by Larrico

Bird Hallway, Carnegie Museum of Natural History, Oakland.
A group of first graders strolls through the hall:

Boy: [serious and motioning to owl case] I was attacked by one of those once.

— Overheard by Stasia

Fuel And Fuddle, Midnight.
About twenty people are waiting outside, with another ten in the entry. A couple approaches the door:

Woman: [Just before touching the door] God… I can’t do it. Not tonight.
[They walk away.]

Pitt vs. Cincinnati Football Game, Heinz Field.
Wind blows some trash across the field:

College Girl: Why is there so much trash on the field?
College Boy: Have you SEEN our football team?

Beehive, South Side.
A middle-aged woman is speaking to her teenage sons. She comments that her cup is “midget-sized,” and then says this:

Middle-Aged Mom: You know what Bob has in our videos? You know, you get married and you snoop around… There’s a video of midgets.
[...]

Midgets riding horses.

— You know, there are probably movies out there of midgets doing just about everything.

— Overheard by Shannon

I’ve been dealing with a medical issue of late, but the updates should be back on track.

Thanks,

Chris