Tue 12 Jun 2007
Posted by Chris Griswold under Uncategorized
1 Comment
Dorm, CMU campus. Afternoon.
Two girls are yelling up to their friend to come down:
Girls: LAUREN!!! LAAAAAUUUURREN!!!
Guy Leaning out Window: LAUREN! I’ve killed for less and I’ll damn sure do it again!
Tue 12 Jun 2007
Posted by Chris Griswold under Uncategorized
No Comments
Subway Restaurant, 7th / Liberty, Downtown.
An older, heavy woman orders a roast beef sandwich:
Woman: Yup, I’m a cannibal.
Subway Sandwich Artist: [polite chuckle] Uh, I think you mean “carnivore“.
Woman: I guess that depends on who you ask.
— Overheard by Megan
Tue 12 Jun 2007
Posted by Chris Griswold under Uncategorized
[3] Comments
Starbucks, Shadyside.
Two socialites are drinking coffee and conversing outside. One woman’s dog is lying under the table near the women’s feet:
Socialite #1: Well, I have to go; I have a house to show in Fox Chapel and then I have to get my Lexus serviced.
Socialite #2: Oh… OK, good luck… Well, um, call me soon!
Socialite #1: [shuffles her feet under the table, searching for her shoes] Hey! Your dog chewed my shoe! YOUR DOG CHEWED MY GODDAMN SHOE!!!
Socialite #2: OH! I am sooooo sorry! I’ll replace them—
Socialite #1: THEY’RE PRADAS! THEY’RE SIX HUNDRED DOLLAR PRADAS!!!
[Woman #2 gets up and walks away quickly with her dog.]
Socialite #2: [quietly, to dog] Good doggie! Mommy loves you.
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