Archive for February 2007

Friday, February 23rd, 2007

The Real Danger Video Games Might Pose to Your Child: Tonight after ER

Inbound Bus Stop, Kelly / S. Trenton, Wilkinsburg:

Lady: [to her son and his friend] I don’t understand why you spend all your time playing video games. It’s like you’re so wrapped up in them, you don’t even take time to watch television anymore.

— Overheard by Alisa Grishman


Friday, February 23rd, 2007

Barry later wondered in passing why he and Steve had locked eyes for so long.

In Line for Pasta Plus, Peterson Events Center, Pitt Campus :

College Guy #1: Hey, man, whatcha doing tonight?
College Guy #2: Oh, you know, man: I got a lotta work. I’m probably going to read for a long time.
College Guy #1: Yeah, me too.
College Guy #2: Then watch some TV. Then rub, like, three out.
College Guy #1: Yeah, man. I hear you.


Friday, February 23rd, 2007

“He has a tubular fight with Shredder scheduled!”

Mellon Square Parking Garage, Downtown:

Frantic Mom on Cell Phone: Oh! His nunchucks, he can’t forget them. Seriously, he needs his nunchucks!

— Overheard by AlwaysReporting


Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

“That professor is a total ’square!!!’” — Bazooka Joe

Intro to Economics Class, Cathedral of Learning:

Econ Professor: So how would you then find the area of the rectangular?
Student: Length times width.
Econ Professor: No. For the rectangular, it’s one half times length times width.
Student: Isn’t that a triangle?
Econ Professor: Yes. So now that we have this area…


Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

A Child’s Trust: Stronger than Botox. And Cheaper.

Sixth Street, Liberty / Penn, Downtown.
Three elderly women walk out of Starbucks:

Elderly Woman #1: My daughter’s been telling my granddaughter that she’s 29 years old for five years now… And just as I was about to tell my granddaughter her real age, she turns to me and said, “And what does that make you, grandma? 40?”
Elderly Woman #2: You didn’t tell her, did you?
Elderly Woman #1: Damn right.

— Overheard by Megan


Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

2,926,324 people reside there. Live there? Not so sure.

Biochemistry class, Langley Hall, Pitt Campus:

Girl with Stuffy Nose: Do people still live in Iowa?!

— Overheard by Katrina


Wednesday, February 21st, 2007

Is There Another Way To Get Through A Day Of Working At Wendy’s?

Wendy’s, Bloomfield:

Manager: Hey, I need that double cheese now.
Employee: I… this one?
Manager: No, this is the bacon… did you make this twice?
Employee: I guess….
Manager: Alright, just make that other one now.
[Manager goes back to customer]
Manager: [looking back] Oh, and, do me a favor: next time someone passes you that blunt… put it back, a’ight?

— Overheard by Kevin


Wednesday, February 21st, 2007

From Charming to Rape-y in Ten Seconds

Fifth Ave Near Tower C, Oakland:
College Guy and College Girl are walking, his arm around her. A Drunk Black Man walks up to them:

Drunk Man: You better hold onto her.
College Guy: I will.
Drunk Man: I ain’t never had a white woman. I’ve had my kind, but no Chinese, neither. You better hang onto her.
College Guy: Yessir.


Wednesday, February 21st, 2007

Two Great Tastes That Taste Great Together

College of Fine Arts, CMU.
An art class has gathered in the middle of the Great Hall, spread in a circle that blocks passage. A music teacher with a Tuba noisily walks through the circle:

Art Teacher: Hey! You! Your tuba’s fucking up my circle!
Music Teacher: Yeah? Well, your circle’s fucking up my tuba.
Art Teacher: Touché.
— Overheard by Connor 


Tuesday, February 20th, 2007

Q:How is a thug like a peaceful war protester?

Across from Barnes and Noble, Murray Ave., Squirrel Hill:

Thug on a Cell Phone: Well, you know man, I got a bad back ‘cuz I got tazed by the PO-lice.