Archive for October, 2006

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Mon 9 Oct 2006

“I even had my business tracksuit on.”

Posted by Chris Griswold under Education, Intelligence, Pitt, Uncategorized
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William Pitt Union, Pitt Campus:

Woman: Like, all of us were totally professional for the presentation. Definitely professional. I don’t know how she could be like, “You weren’t professional.”

— Overheard by Tia

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Thu 5 Oct 2006

What to Expect When You’re Expecting to Beat Your Child

Posted by Chris Griswold under Beliefs, Credos & Theories, Children, Parents & Grandparents, Health: Physical & Mental, Intelligence, Shadyside, Uncategorized
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UPMC Emergency Room Waiting Area, Shadyside:

Pregnant Girl: Ya know, I’m worried about this baby. It’s like I don’t believe in whopping and beating kids at all.
Friend: Yeah, me either.
Pregnant Girl: It’s just that, if somebody ain’t listenin’ to me the first time I say something I will punch them in the chest.
Friend: You can’t punch kids in the chest.
Pregnant Girl: Then they better listen `cause I don’t believe in spanking, but I will punch them in the chest.

— Overheard by Pitt Student

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Wed 4 Oct 2006

In this Overheard, the Bus Driver will be played by Samuel L. Jackson.

Posted by Chris Griswold under @ Bus, Pitt, Uncategorized, Work
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Inbound 71D bus packed with Pitt Students:

Bus Driver: Step to the back! There ain’t no snakes back there!

— Overheard by Cranky CMU Worker

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Tue 3 Oct 2006

Crackers are always causing trouble on buses.

Posted by Chris Griswold under @ Bus, Arguments, Social Divisions, Uncategorized
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71C Outbound, Oakland.
The bus is packed, and a Black Chick sits in an aisle seat next to a pile of crumbled Saltines™:

Older White Dude: Mind if I sit there?
Black Chick: It’s all dirty.
Older White Dude: It’s just crackers; you can brush it off.
Black Chick: [gives shoots a dirty look.]
Older White Dude: [politely snide] Oh, I don’t want to do anything that would offend you.
Black Chick: [re-assuringly] I’m going to be getting off soon.

Black Chick gets off.

Older White Dude: [brushes Saltine crumbs off and sits down.] What a brat.

— Overheard by Sophie

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Mon 2 Oct 2006

There’s truth in stereotypes

Posted by Chris Griswold under Intelligence, Money, Squirrel Hill, Uncategorized
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Self-Checkout Line, Giant Eagle, Squirrel Hill. Sunday night:

Blonde chick: We save 96 cents on our next FuelPerks™. That’s, like, almost a dollar.

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