Archive for April 2006

Tuesday, April 18th, 2006

Install Cherrtree Brand Intimidation-Resistant Windows in Your Home!

Bruegger’s Bagels, Squirrel Hill.
A grizzled man with a salt-and-pepper face-stache sits at a table by himself with his bagel, muttering to himself and staring ahead at the window:

Muttering Man: I can tell you to shut up anytime I want, punk. Yeah, I called you a punk. What’re you gonna do about it?

— Overheard by zig


Monday, April 17th, 2006

Pittsburgh: New York with a Side of Perogies

Penn & 6th, 8:45am
The driver of a BMW lays on his horn at the usual jaywalking day-shift folks, including a Man in a Downtown Alliance Partnership Jumpsuit:

Man in PDA Jumpsuit: Go back to Cranberry, ya bum!

— Overheard by bwzimmerman


Monday, April 17th, 2006

The Revolution Will Not Be Colorized

Basement, Cathedral of Learning:

Man: Let’s start a revolution.
Woman: OK, we need a color.
Man: How about purple?
Woman: No, not purple. Red. Red is for revolutions.

— Overheard by ema


Friday, April 14th, 2006

What a smart swirl!

Gen Chem 2 class of 300 people, Chevron.

The Professor is mixing chemicals together in a dish on an overhead projector so the students can see the colors of the reactions when an orange-red swirl appears in the dish:

Professor: I like the patterns we’re getting.
[He stops to look at the overhead.]
Professor:
Clever.
— Overheard by Sophie


Thursday, April 13th, 2006

Just as soon as the blue minus appears

Atwood Street, Saturday Night, around 1:15.
A group of four students, two guys and two girls are walking:

Girl: Well, after the test you can smoke again.

— Overheard by ema


Thursday, April 13th, 2006

“Now go play with your molecules!”

Forbes Ave., Squirrel Hill.
A Mom and Dad engrossed in scholarly discussion pass a sign that says, “Chocolate contains serotonin!” with their Little Boy:

Little Boy, jumpy: What’s serotonin?
Dad, annoyed to be interrupted: It’s a neurotransmitter.

— Overheard by Kate


Wednesday, April 12th, 2006

FOUR MORE YEARS

Outside McDonald’s, Oakland

Smoking Man, yelling: Four years — FOUR YEARS — I was saying White Christ was my daddy.

— Overheard by zig


Wednesday, April 12th, 2006

You can save the world by making this your outgoing voicemail message.

500, North Side:

Black Man in Camouflage: I’m gonna toss her salad, then I’m gonna toss HER salad. I’m `a be tossin’ some salads all night. I got jelly and I’m-a toss your salad.

Pleasure mobile, tossin’ salads, that’s what I DO.

— Overheard by Maggie


Tuesday, April 11th, 2006

And now the teacher has become the student.

Gen Chem 2, Class of 300 People, Chevron Hall, Pitt Campus:

Professor:
We will have a review session on the weekend before the exam on Saturday or Sunday afternoon. Who votes for Saturday?
[No one raises their hands.]
Professor:
Who votes for Sunday?
[200 students raise their hands.]Professor: I guess Saturday is a recovery day.
— Overheard by Sophie


Monday, April 10th, 2006

Emmit Otter’s Jugband invades the KISS Army

Marketplace (Formerly C-Side), Pitt Campus:

Girl, sarcastically: You know, all the times that I’ve heard Kiss’s “Detroit Rock City”, I’ve never thought to myself, “Gee, something’s missing. Oh, I know what: A washboard.

— Overheard by Lauren