Cathedral Cafe, Cathedral of Learning, Oakland:

Friendly Coffee Lady: Medium or large hazelnut today?
Middle-Aged Redhead Lady: I’ll have a small.
Friendly Coffee Lady: Small hazelnut. Ok.
Middle-Aged Redhead Lady: Small hazelnut. If I have a large, I’ll be peeing all the way home.
Friendly Coffee Lady: Ok!

— Overheard by MacArdle