Forbes and Murray Inbound Bus Stop
Two CMU Students are standing waiting for a bus. Two High School Girls and a Chef sit on the bench:

CMU Student 1: So you’re lactose intolerant now?
CMU Student 2: Yeah. I’ve had rice milk for so long that I can’t even drink milk anymore.
Chef: You don’t like milk?
CMU Student 2: I never really liked the aftertaste. And rice milk is just as good.
CMU Student 1: Milk is good in tomato soup.
Chef: Cream and cilantro is better.
CMU Student 2: Too true! … Once, I had rice crispies with rice milk.
[The High School Girls giggle.]
[CMU Student 2 sees a bus coming. Excited, he jumps and grabs the roof of the bus stop structure.]
Chef: What the hell are you doing? If that thing fell on me, I’d have killed you.
CMU Student 2: If it fell, I’d already be dead.
Chef: Well I’d wake you up and kill you twice! Dumb bastard.
[The High School Girls giggle.]

– Submitted by TheConnor