Heinz Field Exit Ramp, North Side. After a loss to the Patriots:

Creamsicle* #1: I’m writing to Big Ben and Joey Porter tomorrow to tell them they’re a bunch of assholes.
Creamsicle #2: I know!

— Overheard by McArdle

* Overheard in Pittsburgh TrendWatch: Agent McArdle informs us that a “Creamsicle” is a “girl who is tanned to the point that her skin is orange, and bleached to the point that her hair is cream-colored.”